Day 23 since I was injected with the J&J vaccine

Don’t bother reading this…

5/1/21. Saturday.

8:00 – L. leaves for work.

 8:00 – 8:30 -  My alarm goes off – this is way too early. I can’t even think straight or function so I stay in bed because I need transition time.

8:45-9:45 – I crawl out of bed and head downstairs to say good morning to the animal. L. took her out earlier so, technically, I don’t have to take her out now, but I’ve established a routine with her and I go through the motions. She wants me to rub her tummy three times and then she grabs her tennis ball and we go outside.  I notice the fountain has stopped…I’ll fix it later…and the patio needs to be swept. I have other things to do right now, but I’ll come back to the patio.  The dog does NOT go potty – she probably already did with L. – and we return inside for pieces of Impossible Burger for her and coffee for me.

 I straighten the downstairs, change the slipcovers on the dining room couch, and clean the downstairs bathroom toilet.  I sweep the floor and put the pillows on the couch in case someone needs to come inside. I put one of the slip covers in the washing machine.

9:45-11:00 – Shower with coffee. Spa day. Lotion. Shorts and a tank top. Light make-up. I unbraid my hair.

B. texts to say he’ll be here at 11:30 instead.

11:00-11:30 – Gardening.  I text B. that I’ll be in the backyard when they arrive.  I unclog the fountain and sweep most of the patio.

11:30-12:15 – B. and friends arrive and take away the workbench, doors, ladder, and trellis. B.’s daughter gets the workbench; his son-in-law gets the ladder; his gardener gets the doors; and his cleaning lady gets the trellis. I’m so glad someone has a use for all of these items!  Our landfills are so overburdened - I didn’t want to put even more trash and debris in one of them.

I’m converting the garage into an art studio for L. and it’s amazing how  much the space has opened up after the removal of these items.

12:15-1:30 – I finish the last of the Hamburger Helper AND Aftermath. I didn’t like this book.

This is a memoir, written by Alec Klein, an investigative journalist and tenured professor at Northwestern, detailing how his life came apart after a series of false allegations were made from numerous women under a #metoo movement that has run amuck. As he discusses the allegations throughout the memoir, he reminds us constantly that his life’s work – and when you dig more deeply into the memoir you find that it’s only been about 10 years and he was actually asked by the University to take over the project – has been investigating and eventually freeing the wrongfully accused, i.e., people who were sentenced to prison for crimes they didn’t commit and who have been incarcerated for decades. He, Alec, gets them out.

Already, as the reader, we’re supposed to understand that the “irony is exquisite.”  Here is a man who spends his free time, at the expense of his wife and kids because he is never home, freeing the wrongfully accused when he (gasp) is wrongfully accused!

Alec details the University’s investigation, the strange Kafkaesque protocol, the obfuscation, the University’s refusal to provide him with the specific allegations until he is actually being grilled by an investigative panel, the misrepresentations and lies the Administration tells him throughout the process, the University’s refusal to cooperate with Alec’s lawyer…in fact, his lawyer is denied admittance into most meetings between Alec and the University because they say this is a civil case. All of this, I believe.

HOWEVER, as Alec continues to assert he did nothing wrong and debunks each allegation, one by one, a few questions remain…such as Number 1:

“Why did you have a futon in your office?” Several female students reported, over the years [but not to him] that the futon made them uncomfortable, citing it as a “chair differential.”  When Administration asks him about the futon, Alec is incredulous that anyone would care what kind of seating he has in his office.  His response: Why, it’s for my kids, of course!  They like to play on it when they’re in my office. THis begs the question, “Well, why are your kids in your office during work hours?  Why are they in your office at all?” 

Historically, in most work places, women refrain from even discussing their kids because it is generally thought by managers and supervisors [male and female managers, the studies show] that women who are mothers are not as productive as single women, will be more distracted by their kids, and will put children before work.  You know…similar to the same stereotype associated with fat employees, i.e., “They’re fat, so they must be lazy.”  It’s not true.

Here’s another stereotype: “She’s a mom…wow… she’s really busy…there’s no way she can a) get all of her work done; or b) do her work well.” Woe be unto the mother that can’t come in or has to leave work early because…her child is sick! I’ve experienced the scorn from my male manager(s) [female managers can be just as bad] after explaining why I’m using my personal sick time, which, according to my contract, also extends to “sick family.”

As an aside, studies show that when men discuss parenthood or being a Dad in the workplace, statistically, their salaries increase.  You’ve all seen this example, I’m sure (I have)…a male colleague has a modified work schedule because every Tuesday he has to take his young son to baseball practice. Colleagues/staff’s response: “Awww…he’s so engaged…what a great Dad.”  A mother asks if she can leave a half-hour early on Wednesdays to take her daughter to piano and is told by her supervisor, “This is cutting into your productivity and your scheduled work shift. No.” Colleagues/staff’s response: “Who does she think she is?”

So, the fact that Alec has a futon in his office is a red flag for me.  In more recent complaints, female co-eds said they didn’t like the “chair differential” which Alec scoffs at, but almost all of us have seen or had futons in our lifetimes – they’re beds!  You have a bed in your office – as a middle-aged man, at this point in your career, don’t you know that’s unprofessional? Additionally, it’s a rare day when you’ll see a female professor bringing her kids to the college so they can play in her office.  Moms understand that they can’t get anything done with small children underfoot. Doesn’t Alec realize that this is also unprofessional?

A few claims that are NOT debunked, but which he dismisses:

-He arbitrarily cut a female employee from the Medhill Justice Project, which he ran, because he didn’t work well with her and sometimes she bristled when he asked her to do tasks. Well, what did he ask her to do?  Get his coffee?  Fetch his cardigan? Said tasks are never explained. Alec goes on to explain that after he dismissed her from the program, he discovered that her career trajectory was ruined and that it was extremely difficult having to explain to prospective employers why her position ended so abruptly.  She eventually had to take whatever job she could get, which turned out be a soul-crushing bureaucrat position in a field she wasn’t interested in.

-A female student was uncomfortable when Alec complimented her twice, in crowded public settings – a school cafeteria and a school dinner function. Really?  Why would you do that?  And what did you say to the student, in front of a bunch of people (read: men)? Nice legs?  I like that dress?  The compliments are never revealed in the book.

-A female student said it made her uncomfortable when Alec asked her to stand back-to-back so he could measure their heights. Ok, that’s just weird.  Again, why would you do that? The same student also said she had written something on her hand, in pen, and Alec grasped her hand, then turned it over to see what she had written. Don’t you know you’re not supposed to touch people in the workplace?  What is wrong with you?

-A female student didn’t appreciate how Alec pulled the tag out of her T-shirt, when she was wearing it, so he could see what size she was because he was ordering T-shirts for the employees who worked on the Medhill Justice Project.  Seriously?  You can’t ask the female employee for her size?  I mean, it’s almost groping…

-A female editor of a news outlet asked Alec for his comments regarding a former student who applied to work at the news outlet.  Alec gave his former student a glowing recommendation, then talked about how difficult it is for young journalists to get their foot in the door when looking for employment.  He then says to the editor, “Perhaps you can understand…you sound young.”  The editor didn’t like his comment and admonished him for it.

Why would you say this?  Are you ‘fishing’ to see how old she is?  Perhaps so you can ask her out on a date? This is such a bizarre statement…and serves to de-legitimize the editor.  What if she is young?  Maybe she’s actually better than her older peer group…especially since she’s not running around sexually harassing everyone or creating a hostile work environment.

As the investigation unfolds, Alec volunteers to work for a non-profit in Texas, where he is involved in another innocence project that focuses exclusively on releasing wrongfully accused women. The second half of the book discusses Alec’s success with the prison system and the release of approximately 10 women. This section of the book takes on a “Look at me!” quality:  “Look what I’m doing!  And I’m doing it for women!  I couldn’t possibly be the bad guy that everyone says I am!”  The fact that you’re freeing wrongfully accused women from prison doesn’t exonerate you from sexually harassing your female employees. Meanwhile, his wife is forced to quit her job as an elementary school aide and try her hand at ‘retail’, in an attempt to support the family since Alec insists on “volunteering his services” and paying for his own flights from Illinois to Texas and back again.

And, yes, there is a Jesus narrative.  Alec finds “the Lord”, becomes born-again, and never stops talking about Jesus and the trials and tribulations HE experienced.  It is so obvious that Alec is equating himself with Jesus as he discusses his own trials and tribulations, which pale in comparison to what Jesus endured. Alec believes he is a ‘vehicle’ for Jesus, that Jesus is acting through him as he (Alec) works hard to free these wrongfully accused women.  I guess Jesus took a powder when Alec was sexually harassing women (or at the very least, making them feel uncomfortable).

Throughout all of it, Alec is flummoxed by the fact that the very women who are accusing him of a hostile work environment repeatedly applied to work with him over the past 5 years.  Yeah, asshole, that’s what women do!  They hated YOU, but needed a spot on your “Innocence Project” in order to advance their careers and pad their resumes – they also needed a reference/recommendation to submit to prospective employers. And during that time period, it would have been career suicide for any of your former female employees/students to come out publicly about the hostile work environment you created.  They would been skewered in the media.  Here’s a homework assignment for YOU:  Watch “Anita: Speaking Truth to Power” It’s an excellent documentary about the Anita Hill / Clarence Thomas scandal.

I hated this book.

1:30-3:30 – I clean the garage.  It was filthy where the work bench used to be and I also pull down my ex-husband’s old stereo system and several feet of cable. It is so disgusting that I double-mask and wear gloves again. More rat droppings. Gross.

3:30-6:00 – I make a No-crust Mexican quiche.  It’s labor intensive, as there are so many moving parts.

-L. returns from work.  Saturdays are her long day.  She is swamped with school work and will be completing assignments the rest of the day.

6:00-7:00 – B. texts me to see if I have the cable for the work bench – his daughter wants to know.  I take pictures of the two cables I removed from the bench and email to B to see if either of those cables are the right ones.  He says she has pots for me and I’m super jazzed about it – I need to do some more “transplants.”

7:00-7:30 – Finish the last few bits of garage organizing.  It’s amazing how spacious and empty the garage looks now.

7:30-8:15 – I take the dog for a walk.

8:15 – 9:30 – Gardening. I sweep the patio (again), pick up the dog poop, hose down the Astro turf, and water all of my plants.

9:30-10:15 – I talk to L. about prioritizing important assignments and letting other assignments go.  She’s over-extended with the number of classes she has and is exhausted.  I remind her that her primary goal was achieved – she got into Otis and committed.  Her grades no longer matter – it’s okay to get a B or even a C.  She does not need a 4.0 – she’s putting too much pressure on herself.  I ask her to show me this week’s assignments and then I proceed to prioritize them for her, while liberally cutting others.  L. has a 138% in one of her classes – yes, you read that right – she can afford to miss a few assignments.  We strategize assignments for the next week and I’ve reduced her load by about 40%.  L. seems relieved.

10:15-10:30 – We brainstorm on the next project for her Color Theory class, an assignment that’s really stressing L. out because she has no ideas for it, and I propose cutting up pieces of fruit and doing a compare and contrast.  L. proclaims this “a good idea” and decides to put the fruit in colored glasses.  She’s on it and will start working on this assignment as I have deemed this stupid Color Theory class a priority.  She needs it to graduate with an AA.  I hate the teacher AND the class and so does L.

10:30 – 11:00 – I read a Money Diary.

11:00 – 11:40 – I do an Insanity – Pure Cardio  workout.

11:40 – 1:00 – Blog posts.

1:00-2:30 – In my office to start watching the first hour of the film, Cache, for my French Cinema class. I pay close attention, read the subtitles, and take notes.

2:30 – 3:30 - Wow!  The first hour is great!  So far so good. I want to watch the rest of the movie, but should probably go to bed.

Nighttime routine. Bed.